Fun: Write a song

ok. I am not particularly skilled in numbers. I'm okay (I'm korean), but not stellar.

I give up on the list system other than for the done list. lol I get WAY too confused.

anyways.

Since graduated and unemployed equal A LOT OF TIME, as I've mentioned and complained and bragged about MULTIPLE times, I am bored a lot.

So I was whining as usual, and Chris was like.. why don't you write a song?
well, his almost exact words were, why don't you write a theme song for our lizzie mcguire crew? HAHA
Jenn would obviously get the reference, and seeing as you are the only reader (other than from Russia.. according to the stats page.. wtf), you are obviously the only one that I care to mention in my blogs anyways.

And I always wanted to write a song.
Not to toot my own horn (which I really love to do often times HAHA jokingly and seriously), I think i'm musically talented.
whatever. haters gonna hate, but I think I should give myself a pat in the back once in a while.
I can play the piano fairly well, being Asian and all.
And my fundamental's shit, but I don't think it's of an utmost importance in songwriting anyways.

So, what the hell.
WHY NOT? (in honor of hillary duff HAH)

The one thing I would hate is for it to sound corny.

ugh we'll see hahahaha

Random Thoughts: School

This whole not doing anything must be getting to my head, especially with the state of duress I have been under for ummm.. TOO LONG!

Because a moment ago, a thought popped into my head--that I want to go back to school. WTF?

I can justify this ridiculous (or genius??) notion with a few facts:

1. It is quite late. 1 AM right now.
2. I may be going insane.
3. I am constantly stressed these days.
4. I am going through my post grad freak out phase!
5. quarter-life crisis.
6. I actually miss school.
7. I actually enjoy learning. Just not exams and what nots.
8. I am bored out of my freakin mind.
9. All my TV shows are ending. So, I have nothing to do now..
10. I may be going insane. like.. seriously.
11. I AM SO BORED.
12. I do not have a legitimate career right now.
13. I hate not knowing what my next step is. As a student, I always knew.
14. I am just freaking out. no surprise here! hah
15. Masters/Ph.D. cap and gown are freakin awesome.
16. I like feeling smart... and actually getting smarter haha.

But, yea.  shit. I was pretty damn convinced until like an hour ago that I was DONE with education for a long time. But, maybe not?

I need more excitement in my life.

Slowly going insane,

Hayon

Meltdown

Ok. Meltdown is a bit dramatic, but I guess Chris doesn't call me a drama queen for no reason.

I have been experiencing my quarter-life crisis for quite some time now, especially after I realized that I am graduating with no particular plans and no particular goals.

After every dreadful graduations, I knew where I was going--next stage of school. duh. But, I am now graduating college in a week, and I am freaking out.

I don't know how other people are handling their grad realization, but I am handling it TERRIBLY.

My poor bf did not see this one coming, lol. poor guy. oops!

And of course, I was supposed to be "studying" for my finals which I cannot emphasize how little I care about them (even though at the same time I am stressed out beyond belief for.. so what a freakin' conundrum), which means I was on facebook and pinterest. And I said in my head (because I am alone in my room and avoid talking to myself just to prevent the onset of insanity), "I can totally do this at some point" when I came across studded blouse. And by "do," I meant I can totally stud up my old jean dress which I realized could look "hip" now thanks to the vintage trend.

Then, it hit me.

I say that ALL THE TIME, annoyingly.

I was so consumed by everything else in life that I forgot to just do things. Or maybe I never did things.

Not to toot my own horn here, but I am CREATIVE! I am FUN! I HAVE SKILLS! I CAN DO THINGS!

So in my finals delirium, I am starting this blog.
Because I am SICK of not finishing what I start (other than education and movies and books), I will make a "bucket list" of some sort. I really don't want to call it that because things that will be mentioned aren't really my "dying-to-do" list. it's more like "oh let's give myself some credit for doing the little things."

So, my love for crossing things off the list and my newfound passion to start and finish something a little extraordinary, I'm going to do this.

First one on the list - Blogging about something cool!

With hope and doubt,

Hayon